Love VS Being Loved

What's the difference between them?
One is to love someone
One is somebody loving you

Guess which category I am?
Love
I used to be in the small portion of being loved
Even that is just a tiny little small portion
I am happy
Even though I tried to change and be satisfied with it
It never enough
As time pass
Things doesn't get better as I wish
It get worst
The small portion had became something else

The reason he gave me is he treated me as family member
So he doesn't have to pay so much attention to pretend or care so much
Honestly, then for girl to treat him as family member
Is it the responsibility to prepare everything and do everything and make him the center of the world?
No
There is no such bullshit
I guess no matter how is the position of the person is
If you really care
You will care eventually

All I felt was loved
NOW?
All I felt about you is YOU YOU YOU YOU
You are hungry, you ate my stuff;
You need to eat, you want me to cook;
You are tired, you want me to stop bugging you and let you sleep;
You need to work out, you want me to let you out;
You need freedom, you want me to give you space;
You need exercise, you want me to tolerate;
You YOu YOU

How about me?
You are hungry, how about me? Aren't I am the same? But I still need to get up and prepare everything
You ate my stuff, how about me? All those biscuits and stuff are prepared for me you finished it, then mine?
You need to eat, how about me? I need to prepare everything when you want to eat, but I can't go out eat myself when I NEED to eat
You are tired, what about me?  Aren't I tired everyday class, work, house chores, activities while you wondering Facebook everyday?

You never thought of me everytime
You used to think of me last time
When I was hungry, no matter where and when it is, you will always find a way to help me settled even listen to my nagging for hours, not ignore me and just let me settle alone
When I was tired, you used to give me a ride immediately from anywhere just to get me home or rest, not ask me to find my way home just because you are not free
When we were having meals together, you will thought that maybe you might want to leave something for me and not finish things up alone
Whenever and whatever you did, you will always thought of me as much as I thought of you
I am not expecting you act just like I do
But at least a little?

男生们你们可以做完78条吗 ? (:
1、把FB 密码告诉她。❤
2、不凶她。x
3、不伤她心。x
4、不欺负她。x
5、不许骗她。❤
6、不可以打她。❤
7、不对她摔东西。❤
8、不许先挂她电话。x
9、不许对她大声说话。x
10、不做对不起她的事。❤
11、不把别人气发在她身上。❤
12、不叫她做不愿意的事。x
13、不许拿她和前女友比较。❤
14、不许嫌她手艺不好（再难吃也要夸好）。❤
15、不给她吃一些对她身体不好的东西。❤
16、不能对任何一个人都比她好。❤
17、冬天允许她把手放到你身体里。❤
18、行街时 , 要拉着她的手 , 不许放。x
19、过马路时一定要把她牵紧。❤
20、陪她逛街时不能说累。x
21、行街时要为她拿东西。❤
22、大节小节都要送礼物给她（不在乎礼物的贵贱）。x
23、无论她什么时候饿 , 都要陪她吃饭。x
24、吵架一定是你先道歉。❤
25、她撒娇的时候你要配合。x
26、她生病时要监督她吃药。❤
27、她打电来时一定要接。x
28、她不舒服时要陪在她身边。x
29、在她失落时 , 你要安慰她。x
30、她哭时 , 你要把她紧紧地抱着。❤
31、她生日时 , 必须第一个时间给她浪漫和惊喜。❤
32、答应她的事不能讨价还价。x
33、可以让她随时翻你手机。❤
34、有事随叫随到。x
35、晚上不要把手机给关了。❤
36、每天要打电话给她。❤
37、上网时 , 第一时间看她在不在。❤
38、她去别的地方时 , 要记得随时打电话给她 , 让她小心。❤
39、她喜欢什么就给买什么。x
40、把她照顾好 , 不让她生病。❤
41、把她的号码放在第一位。❤
42、对她要一心一意。❤
43、收到她短信马上回。❤
44、在你朋友面前给足面子她。❤
45、散步时要走在她的左侧。x
46、无论一起多久都要保持新鲜。x
47、危险的事不能让她做。❤
48、下雨时 , 要为她打伞。❤
49、记得她的爱好。❤
50、有快乐时要和她一起分享。❤
51、有痛苦时要和她一起分担。x
52、要给她介绍你所有的朋友。❤
53、要会逗她笑。❤
54、要说到做到。x
55、要学会做饭给她吃。x
56、要相信她。❤
57、要学会自己检讨。x
58、要给她暖被窝。❤
59、要接受她的过去。❤
60、要给她安全感。x
61、在心里她是你最爱的人。❤
62、她发脾气要哄她开心。x
63、她任性要迁就她。x
64、约会不可以让她等。❤
65、约会等多久也不可以离开。❤
66、陪她玩不可以说没时间 , 地方有她选。x
67、时时刻刻要想着她。x
68、不可以看别的女孩子超过三秒 , 最好不看。❤
69、送她回家要到家门口 , 等她上楼才离开。❤
70、到家要给她说 晚安。x
71、看她做事 , 要帮她做事 , 还要认真做好。x
72、好吃的东西要给她吃。x
73、早上要叫她起床。❤
74、要买早餐给她吃。❤
75、她要没起床 , 要帮她刷牙洗脸。❤
76、她要不想起床 , 要喂她吃早餐。❤
77、在生命里要把她放在第一位，x
78、要让她做最幸福的女人❤

I am not asking you to do all these things
It won't last long
But
At least At least care about me?

You said that you love me and care about me
But honestly, I don't feel that
You said that you put me at the first place
Honestly, I don't think so
Your actions and what you said are different
You said that what I asked is for you to 24 standby for me
I am not asking that
I am just asking whatever you do, maybe you might want to think about me?
You might said that, it will be tiring if everything regarding us have to think twice
Well,
I always think of waiting you for meals no matter what you did before
I always think of leaving the best part of the meals for you even you didn't ask
I always think of helping you cleaning and tidying stuff even you didn't care
I always think of helping you get something when I was buying stuff
I always think of preparing meals that you preferred the most
I always think of you
Everything I did mostly is YOU
And I lived with it for almost 3 years
And you have been living in this wonderful and lovely life for 3 years and expecting it to continue

Honestly,
A relationship is need two ways
It's not single
I am so damn fucking tired

I am not asking you treating me like a princess or what
At least what we did is balance
Only that it will last long
Did you get it?

What I mentioned to you about I no longer rely on you
Is not about what
Is true where whenever things happen, you never there
You never thought of my position and thoughts
I said that I as if that I didn't have a boyfriend
But you mention that you also didn't feel like you have a girlfriend
Reason is just because I don't want to hanging around with your friends
That is it
Again, is about YOU again
Cause I didn't able to be out with your friends and you don't have the "face"
Seriously, What are you expecting me to think?

I am seriously unable to draw your attention to me
It's always
1. Family
2. Gym / Football
3. Money
4. ME
And what your answer given to me?
It's because of my fucking appearance
Well, honestly, I looked much fucking ugly when you know me
Then why me?
You said that is your nature that you will care about appearance a little bit as it's your horoscope etc
What you want me to say?

Love and being loved
Have you ever thought that I really can't stand it anymore?
Did you really think that you going to ignore the problem?
Did you even thought of me? What I thought? What I want? What I wish?
I love you
I know I do
DO YOU?

As I asked you before, what sacrifices you have made for me
Your answer is "Silence"

You really made me feel like I am a person that better than a maid
Which at least you show respect and care
But I am not your mother
I don't want to do everything for you anymore
You bought a thermal rice bowl
Claim that you will cook for your Tuesday class
Honestly, you are waiting me to cook for you and help you save the money and trouble
Did you have a slightly, just a slight thought that
I am a student like you?!
Worst, my subject and burden is heavier than you
You expect me to do all those stuff
You said that you are tired and busy
What about me?
Have to think of that?

Everytime I mention it
You will just settled on the spot and thinks that it is done
Just like today
I wasn't tear for nothing
It's not solely because you forget to cook rice
It's about that you know that I will be home and prepare lunch
You never thought that maybe you might have to cook rice before I am back
But you claimed that next time you will cook it anytime
It's not the fucking problem!
It's about you never thought about me
You never stand on my position to think
All you thought of is
You want to eat at home, even sometimes I am busy
You want to get a free, happy, wonderful life
It won't last long
You expect me to help you change mattress, wash it, and keep it for you
I AM NOT YOUR FUCKING MAID!!
At least maid get paid !

You really never thought of me
You are just lazy to think about it
I am really tired

You always asked me is it so hard and tired and suffer to be with you
Yes, because you never consider me and you always think of you
All I ask is for you love treat me like a normal girl not a wife
Even I had married to you
I will divorce soon enough

This is not the life I chosen
I didn't plan to continue this kind of life in the future
To you, it is a bright and happy future
Not to me
I want somebody that care about me, love me, considerable
Can you?
You think of your own

A deal is a deal
But the time will pass
I am done trying
I am done with all those talking
Whether you get it or not
Whether you like it or not
There won't be second time
Think about it