Overwhelm Flatter

I got a Facebook Message last night
I was sleeping like shit and didn't notice about it until this morning

Hi Teng Ang
I'm Helen
Nice to meet you
I'm a make up teacher. Currently I'm looking girls to be mine make up model for my before and after make up photo shooting album collection event. You look pretty in your photos and I found you are suitable and meeting mine requirements. Are you interested to be my make up model? Please feel free to reply if you were interested.
cheers
Helen

SERIOUSLY?!
I am so dead
I mean people said I look nice in the picture
SHIT SHIT SHIT
Profile picture is angel shooting
Of course it looks nice!
It's like the best of the most picture only people use it for profile picture

SHOT SHOT SHOT
I am SO DEAD!
So, here goes my reply:


Hi, Sorry for late reply last night.
Well, I was really overwhelmed by this unexpected favour that you asked for. I kinda afraid that I can't really helped you much as I don't really know how to make up and stuff.. Plus, I doesn't look that nice as shown in the picture, kinda afraid that you might get dissapointed.. And I do notice that you are from Penang, I currently still studying in Melaka. I am afraid that I can't make it for your album shooting cause of the distance problem. Unless you really don't mind about it

Please say you mind
Please say you mind
Please say you mind
I am so not a model people
I AM F***ING SO NOT

Selfish, Reckless, Egotist

I mean that's you
You never consider about anybody
Most of the time or ALL the time you were thinking about YOURSELF

Honestly, it's not only to me
To anybody
Maybe you are kind to me
But honestly, you are not

Dinner with people
Yes, they owe you a favour
They treat you
You ordered expensive stuff?
And you mention that you will order it too even you paid yourself?
Really? Is that true?
You are just the same as my sister
I ordered cheaper stuff cause I knew you will ordered something expensive

Drive issue
Driving so fast even though I will be car-sick?
And even after I asking you to slow down?
Then all you asked is, "Don't you want to be home earlier?"
Really?!
I know you are tired
I know why you drove so fast
But seriously
Ignore the matter of fact that I will be car-sick
Did you ever consider of penalties or fees charged for high speed?
Somemore is people's car
Did you ever consider that something might happened by driving that fast?
You not even driving that kind of speed daily

I mean
Just because you are tired
You want to rush home and you never bother about anything

Same thing goes for the incident during library
I was complaining there were no sound from the earphone
And what you did?
Still remember?!
You were like pulling it straight from my head
WTF?!
Honestly, I was fucking irritating
What was that?!
Did you ever consider that it HURTS?!
But all you think is you want to fix the thing and stop my complaining

During the Jonker
You complaint that I was putting on temper again
Look, let's make things clear
People don't get upset by its own
IT HAS TO BE SOMETHING HAPPEN!
I mean is that so hard to walk with me?
It's like you feel boring and frustrated
I know it was hot
But for god sake
It's JONKER

Ignore the matter of fact that it was in Jonker
Even movies doesn't make any difference
Still remember that first morning I reached Melaka?
I woke up around 9am plus
And you wanted to watch 11am movie
And your reason is there is nothing for us to do if the movie is on 6pm or 8pm
Seriously, what the fuck is that?!
I just want to spend some time with you
And that's what you said to me
Then only I know the main reason is morning have discounted price
JUST BECAUSE you wanted to save the RM4
You wanted me to go movie after 6 hours night bus around 11am
Seriously?!

Now you were saying about me putting temper
Keeping all those stuff in one
Honestly, it's not about what I didn't say
It's about what you didn't posses
You didn't even listen
It's not I didn't say what is the problem
Is the matter that you didn't feel that it is a problem
You think the only problem is ME
Your FUCKING irritating, annoying, concurring girlfriend who never tolerate you, never care about you and never put herself on your stand and keep ruin the environment

I lied

I lied to Juin How that I will be fine
I lied to him that I am fine

NO
I am so NOT fine
I want to cry
I want him to bring me out
Out of here

But I guess he can't
So I lied

I am sorry
I can't let anybody worry
I have to be strong
I am sorry for lying

Dress Day 2

Well, today it's time for shopping
But I am not that happy to be around with her

I found some dress
But it suppose to be RM60 plus minus the shop sell RM200

Then the stories kept going
I guess I don't have to say much
Nothing end up nice

We did found some dresses
Cheap and not bad one
But
I doesn't look like last time where most of the clothes are fine
I look plummy
Know what did my sister said?
"You are fat, of course it looks fat"
"Come on, you wear what also look fat cause you are fat man"

When I come back home
My dad was trying to make joke
But it wasn't funny
It was hurt
It IS hurt
"You can't find any dress is either your stomach shown or your shoulder looks fat"

Even my mother doesn't help much
"I have to remind you, during your internship, you will gain more weight"

Weight
Weight
Weight
I gain weight doesn't cause any problem to anybody
I gain weight doesn't affect anybody
Why you guys have to do this to me?

My boyfriend
I know he cares
He mentioned it before
HE just pretend that he doesn't care

I mean
Why everyone so care about it so much?

I don't hate my look
I don't hate my weight
I am happy with it

But I feel like I going back again with my primary school life where everyone is talking about my weight
WHY?
WHY?

I feel like want to cry
But I have to pretend like nothing happen

I want to be strong
But I really really want to find a place to cry
Can I?

NO
I know I can't

Which one?

Which one is better for the wedding day time?

Dress Day 1

Shopping and looking for dinner dresses day 1
Honestly, I doesn't like it

Yesterday I went shopping in AutoCity with my sister
Due to the reason that she had broke up with her boyfriend
Fine
I went with her
And she found 2 dresses
And I accompanied her walking around
When we reached any shop
She is the one choosing and testing
She don't even bother about me
While I am the one giving her opinion and helping her carry stuff
Some more I paid for her

Today, mother urge me to get a dress
I went to Jusco
But the fucking bitch was talking phone with another guy
Seriously, she just broke up and she was planning to sub a line under another guy
What is the matter of her?
But who cares anyway?
She already with the another guy even they haven't broke up
So I just don't mind

But she was talking phone with that guy all the time and didn't even bother to look at me
Or even help me to choose
When I asked her to help me choose
Her answer was "you choose yourself, not that you don't have your own eyes"
Seriously?

I found a dress
I kinda like it so much
I spotted it long time ago
But never dare to try
Finally I tried
Yeap, I looked fat on the shoulder
But the lady took a jacket for me
Then my sister comment was "not even nice, it's not the dress problem, its your problem"

I was totally no comment
When I reached home
My sister told my mother that the dress drawing too much attention so I shouldn't buy
HaHAHA
I really really really no comment

draw too much of attention
Seriously?!

What do you think about it? 

I hate YOU

I hate people put an image on me
I hate my own sister to say this thing on me
I hate my own mother to do this on me

Seriously,
I am not pretty as you
I am not as sporty as you
But you don't have to say me like that
"I am a cold speaker?"
FUCK YOU !
"I am not an attracker?"
ASS HOLE!!

I really hate you sometimes!!

HOnestly, I really hate it!

心情即度不好！！！！！