Chivas

Great~!
I am going to be dead

I Think I will be Dead SOON

Going-to-be-sick person go for OverTime!
I think I will be slaughter soon
*Sweat*

Sleepy

Everybody is sleepy except me
Everybody is busy except me
I want to go out as well!!

But where to go
No money
JPA please bank in money faster!!

I want sing K at least 1 hour
Please
I am going to bore to death !

Sushi

Well, been to Sushi King just now
Not a very long queue
We waited for like less than half an hour
Thank god
Eaten 21 plates

But seriously
I love Salmon!!!
and Prawn of course!!
and baby Octopus!!
They are so lovely!!!
A little bit happy
But we spend for over RM48 for this meal
Worth it?
Well, abit maybe

But I won't go to eat there again
I prefer eat in a peace mood
At least I can enjoy the food slowly without people actually staring at me
Some more I won't have to keep my eyes hunting for sushi

Let make it this way
I would prefer to spend a little higher of price to get a better quality of environment when I eat
Well, you can say that I am particular with food
Yes, I am
I just don't like being rush and urge when I eat cause I eat very SLOW
I always make people wait me no matter how fast I tried
So why not I just enjoy the food ?

By the way
I think I am going to be sick

But I still want to sing K
No time to go cause night time is really expensive for me alone to sing
T.T

Still
Tomorrow have class
Gotta work and stop online and movie!
Start to work you lazy bone!!

Sick?

Am I sick already ?
Feel like sore trough + a little bit of cough
Too many fried food?

Feeling cold with feet and hands
Sleeping all day
But still feel that head is very heavy
But didn't have fever
Sick?

Well, didn't feel hungry either
Didn't eat for my lunch and dinner
Tea time - maggie
Dinner - red bean soup
Will I die?
I must be joking
Hahaha

I don't want to be sick!
I want to eat sushi tomorrow!!
Must get well!!
Sushi!!!

KL One Day Trip

Tired!
Wake up at 6am something then come back around 9pm something!
Walk all day
LRT/Monerel and Bus all the way
Just realize even without car it wasn't that hard to shopping in Time Square

Guess what I did whole day?!
Sakae Sushi!!!
Yummy ~!
We have one in Penang but I never been there
All I know is my sister always go there
Go finally Time Square got one
So...!!
haha..
3 persons eat almost RM124!!
Damn!!
I love Sashimi!!
Love it love it!!!

Actually I suppose to accompany him to buy clothes for his brother's wedding
Didn't plan to buy anything AT ALL
But something make me almost no mood for the whole day
I bought a formal skirt for RM99!!
Just because the salegirls push me to try over 10 skirts
And I am shy to reject!!!!
Damn1!!
I am so mad with myself!!
I already in a broke condition and I had spend RM100 for a skirt!!!
I wish I didn't spend that money!!!

Then Michelle were there after the thing happen
Thank god!
I just realize I miss her so much
I miss the time where I always hang out in EP and stay over her house with my Small J and her catty
I miss the time where we fight for our exam
I miss the time where I used to talk with her EVERYTHING
I miss her so much!!

When I saw her
I feel like trying to update everything she missed but I was really hungry and tired
So ...
But I just glad she drop by
I miss you

Damn tired right now
But still have things to do
T.T

ANyway
It's kinda pleasant trip anyway!

Peace Speaker

Damn!
Suddenly feel that I am a peace speaker
I speak on the behalf of another person
Hoping that both of them will be fine

Really
Justin got love problem
Suddenly I become their speaker
I become the middle man
Jezz
Don't know what should I do

All I know I am tired talking and talking
Wondering what will happen to both of them

Just know that everytime I see Justin
Sure involve some comfort and alcohol
>.<"

I don't know whether I am helping them or making them worst
Cause I myself is suck in love life

God help them

I am Not Worth

I seriously not worth for people to wait or like or love
I don't have the look
I don't have good temper
I am pampered
I am a bad girl
I makes stupid mistakes

The only thing that I am proud of is my ability
But no guys will like girl that over them
So
Why Why Why ?

Hiazz
I really not worth
I am just an ordinary girl
I just want to be a normal girl

Wow~! Never see that Coming

Well, I really didn't see that coming
Everybody know this?
Why didn't I feel that?
I think I am so stupid

Everybody know that Arthur likes me??
And I am the only person who don't know??
Really ?
You kidding?
I thought what Billy said is just his assumption
But its turns out to be true???!!!

Damn!!

Patient

I tell myself to be patient
I don't want to argue with people
But sometimes
I wish that I am a good-tempered person

Well
Sometime we tried to be considerable
But sometime I have my own temper

I don't mind if you download movie or what so ever
Cause I also did it
But I hope that sometime please see the time
Well
That's what I did
I tried to download during my sleep
But sometimes you are awake the whole night
So I didn't on it
I on it when nobody at home

Your internet is directly connect to your computer
That's why when you online especially when you open some website that takes a lot of speed
All of us can't online
Nobody want to tell you cause you said that you seldom at home
But even day time it is hard to online when you awake
Haiz

Not that I want to complaint or what
Just
It starts to affects us
Like right now
I can't go in Facebook to check the committee's data
How am I suppose to do the SAPS ?
I can't access into it
How am I suppose to do all those thing?

Jezzzzz
Sometime I wish that I will be patient enough
Patient
Patient

Drunk

Last night was the first time I drank Chivas
I always saw my dad drinking but never tried myself
Well, it's pretty hard to drink
Harder than Vodka
At first it wasn't really nice to drink
But I still drink it after all

Me and Justin was drinking alone
Like both of us have problems and both of us want to case that problem away

Actually this is the first time I saw Justin so emo
I barely able to comfort him
I just let him cry
Nothing much I can do
Just wish that I can actually help him
Hope he can be better soon

Honestly I started to one-time finished after the 2nd glass
I think I also wish that I can be drunk
Soon I realized that I started to pour chivas > cola
And started to drink while comforting Justin
Too bad
Just feel some dizziness and headache
Doesn't really drunk
6 glasses
Damn!
I really wish that I can just be drunk and when I wake up everything is done

After comfort Justin sleep
I went back with Jack
Still feeling well
But after awhile I have no idea what I did
Maybe the alcohol started to work
Too bad I can't sleep the whole night until 4am or 5am
I makes me really tired

When I wake up this morning
The stomach wasn't that good somehow
Great!

Being drunk
Is it good?
Or it's just make thing worst?
Seriously
Sometime I want to be drunk
But I know I can't
Haizzzzz

PASSED PASSED PASSED !!!!!

Well, you know what??!
I passed!!!
I passed FAR!!!
Thank god
But the result wasn't good
But I think that's good enough
At least I passed

I am satisfied
Cause I consider I am lucky
I know how much effort I put in it
So I won't blame if I get these type of result

All I can say
I don't want the same thing happen this semester
I must get all A this semester
I WILL get all A
If not my CGPA can't go up
Really

Thanks for letting me passed
Really
Thanks for everybody that encourage me
Siok Ching especially who taught me
2 special people that encourage me
And others
*pray*

Thank you!

Is My English Bad?!

I am so confident with myself that my English is good enough
Well, not as good as a pro but at least is average level AT LEAST
Never thought she actually said that
I know I never good enough if compared with my sister
I never good enough
I never smart enough
I never sporting enough
I am never as good as my sister
Even my friends thinks I never as good as my sister
Both social and appearance
Fine

I know I never good enough
But at least
Can't you at least
recognize your own daughter's ability?
What I did never good enough for you

4 flat to you is my responsibility
Below than that
you will say
"Just try your best is enough"
But under your tone you were saying
"How can this be happened?"
You were mad at me obviously at that FAR exam
You were mad
You accuse me
"How can you don't know?"
Then you heard me cried only you say "if everybody don't know then there is nothing you can do"

When I got 1st place in studies
You think that's normal
You never praise me
All you did is
"Don't think this is good.. there will be a tougher road.. Don't you think you are good"
When people ask about me
You said "She is not good. Her english so bad, never improve. Result also that that good'
Cause I didn't get 4 Flat!
That's why

I never good enough for YOU!

Obviously You Don't Know ME

I might be a stubborn girl
I might be a bad temper girl
But I am not a person that need to be controlled of
Seriously

I have been following orders for like my entire life
And I am free to do whatever I like outside that range of area
So I don't need another person to actually tell me what to do
Or to get permission to do anything
I am a free person

I lived so long not to follow peoples orders
I will do whatever I like
So don't even think about me listen to everything you said
Or get permission from anybody

Arguments

I woke up at 7am this morning just to help my mum prepare all the things needed for my grandpa's 100th death ceremony
Well, it's really lots of things that my mum prepared
God kuih, cake, 4 dishes, desserts, fruits etc
Even the whole table not enough to put the dishes
Imagine how much she prepared

When it's 8am I went to buy Hokkien mee
But you know what??
I accidentally poured the soup
I act very fast to wipe it off so that my mum didn't see it
I got "heat" by the soup
Suddenly don't have the mood to eat it anymore
But still
I need to take my breakfast

Then relatives start to arrive
I am fine
Until I saw HER
I can see evil coming
The small evil arrived
I pretend to ignore them as well

The ceremony starts
During the ceremony I feel like I want to slap the small evil
So noisy and really no manner
If I am the parents this child won't survive without get slap
Always want to play ipad and noisy during the pray
Seriously??

Then after the things done
Electricity gone
Everybody was complaining about the heat
Well, it's not something that we can help
Then they started to eat the food that my mum prepared
Seriously
Everybody is eating a bit and a bit while my mum is busy cooking at the back
Seriously
I don't know whether they know about how tired my mum prepared these??
Fine
Then there is the evil family
My char shao bao!!!
You already bought yours why ate mine?!!!!!
So calculative ???
Then whatever food that you can find in my house you eat!
Seriously you are damn cheap
You ate whatever is expensive
You know I nearly chase you out of the house?!
I really really want to shout at your wife for being such a bitch
I really really really really don't know why she can do like this

Today was a very very very tired yet mad day
I am mad with them
For not being considerable
Not all of them
Just CERTAIN people

It's like my mum busy prepared all those thing for you
Even my pork leg and chicken leg
You guys eat and eat
Even the pork meat you guys finished it
I don't even eat it
You don't think that everything is paid by grandma
Some of them are my mum paid
And specially for me!
Thanks for being so nice for finishing it!

I pitied my mum
I want to help my mum
But
She doesn't seems to care

No comment
I just hope that everybody can stand on her perspective
To appreciate her hardwork in preparing everything and maintaining every relationship
Don't spoil it

100th

Dear Grandpa,

It had been your 100th day of your death, I guess grandma still very upset about it. She cried when we all praying. I think she thought about you somehow. It's really weird that I have not much thing to think about you. All I can remember is the way you talked and the way you walked when I meet you.

It's really been a long time that I didn't see you after that day. I am so sorry that I couldn't make it to see you for the last time that day. I am so sorry. I might miss you, a little bit, perhaps. But when I think back everything, I only have your memories for these few years.

You barely care about us since we were child. All you care is all the male cousin.You don't even know our names until you actually asked me when I was Form 3. Still you can't remember it. The only reason why you start to care is because all the male cousin are not good in their studies and not behaving well. That's why, I think. It's really tragic to think about it that we are the spare tire. But at least, you remember that you still have us. At least you get the chance to know about us for these few years. I won't want to blame anybody. I don't even blame you as you are originally from China but maybe sometime I wish we have more time to get to know each other. But here you are, 100th days.

Mum works so hard for today, preparing lots of thing. Your favourite cake, kuih, food, dishes just for you. She remembered everything about you. Seriously, even you and grandma treat her not really good (of course, not that bad but just being unfair) she still cares about both of you actually. But I know the reason why you and grandma behave this way. But everything should comes to an end shouldn't it? All I can say that grandma can actually changed. Please don't mess up everything that my parents works for. If she did, she might be bullied by HER. At the end, my dad will be sad and you will be upset in heaven.

It's really weird that I feel that you came back just now. Or at least you were there. I can actually feel that you were there. (Maybe I am a bit sensitive, but I strongly feels that you were there) It suppose to got electricity stop at 9am. But, there is still electricity in my house by then. After all these ceremony done at 11am, the electricity got cut! Damn! It's pretty weird and shocked! It's like you trying to make us comfortable during the ceremony and the electricity gone after things done. It's really exact second when the thing finished the electricity gone!

What's happen is happened, I will miss you and remember you by heart. May you rest in peace! I love you!

Love

Jiney

I Hate Being Home

Stress
Orders over orders
Scolds over scolds
Blames after blames
When can it stops?
Very tired and stress
Sometime being home is really tiring

Anger

I am mad
Mad until I don't know how to measure or describe it
You know why
I don't want to say much
I am just mad

Today is NOT My Day

Part 1
I am not allow to contact somebody
Well, I might break abit
But I am trying hard to follow
Trying very hard
Not sure what decision to make
But at least for now
This is the decision

Part 2
No breakfast!
It took me almost 1 hour to find my breakfast
Driving around Bukit Mertajam for like 1 hour to buy my breakfast
But none of them Open!!
Seriously
Today is not my day!

Part 3
No pen!
I want to buy pen
But all out of stock!!
Seriously!

Part 4
Got shout when I was sleeping by my mum
Got scold without reason by my mum
Totally in a very bad mood

Part 5
Got scold by a person who think he so pro
He is a friend of him
Said me like a bitch
And said like everybody know what I did to him
FINE
It makes me have the sudden to break up everything
I really mad!
As if I am not good to their friend!
FINE
Want me to break up with him?!!
It's that what you guys meant??
泼妇骂街，50步敢敢笑100步，自己的''丰功伟绩''都已名扬四海，恶名昭彰，路人皆知，还有闲情雅致来当起海洋管理员，管的那么宽。谢谢你的＂呵护备至＂，鸡婆8卦，当然，我会＂虚心学习＂，看你如何班门弄斧。言尽于此，希望你能自我反省。请勿对号入座。
I hate you!!!

Part 6
You told me that your hp broke NOW
Seriously
It was fine when I gave you
Then today to tell everybody that your hp is spoilt
Then you tell me that your hp is spoilt
Seriously?!!
After 1 week your hp broken is my responsibility?!!!!!
Then when I asked you you said that day afternoon when I passed to you already spoilt
Damn you
Shouldn't you tell me by then??!!
If you tell me or Jack
At least we can bring to hometown to repair
Then you said that you want to bring the hp to me when semester start
Seriously since when is my fault!?:!?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

XX
my hp cant open le ==

Teng Ang
swt... that day bkn ok le meh?

XX
can open a while only lol
then afternoon dead le
so sem start i pass to u or jack ok?


Fucked up!!
Today is not my day!!
Don't messed up with me!!
I am not in a very good mood!!

Break A Leg

Ohaiyo!
I think I going to break my right leg
Congratulation!

Damn!
My leg start to pain ABIT
Not sure whether will it be fine
Hopefully it won't swollen

I guess I still didn't get use with letting my parents to know EVERYTHING
When I got hurt
She asked me:"Did you sprain your leg when you jump?"
Without any thinking
I said:"NO"
Then only I know what she asked
See?
See how it gets to habit after almost 20 years of "training"?
I already get used with this
Suddenly can't change back
Just get used to be my own
To settle things my own
To know everything my own
Letting myself alone in the world
Sometime I wish I can be like this
Nobody to rely on
Just be myself
But 2 years of relying TOO MUCH on him makes me can't independent
Suddenly scare of changing
But do I still want to stay?
No confirm answer
No confirm reason for me to do so
*Tired*

Guess I need to go see a doctor after I back Malacca
Hopefully my right leg will be fine